To share a few stories to highlight Betty’s life are excerpts from her eulogy:
“…We were surrounded by multitudes of kids growing up. Mom didn’t just run a home day care center. She was a second Mom to many children, cousins, neighbors, and strangers that became friends. Always hugging, always loving. For some reason every child was afraid to act up, not because of a punishment, but because no one wanted to disappoint her. Instead they wanted to laugh with her and enjoy her homemade cookies.
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The game we always loved to play with her was “Laugh in the Dark”. She would just shut off the lights and we would simply just laugh!
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How many times did we see our Mom talk to strangers and ended up listening for hours. Strangers from all walks of life. She accepted everyone no matter what their differences.
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Mom wasn’t political, she was just kind. An example of that was after 9-11. People were eyeing a Muslim family at a crowded restaurant with distrust and distain. My mom, who’s only focus was smiling and welcoming a conversation, went up to the lady and praised what a beautiful veil she had and how my mom loved the sparkles in it. She chatted a little bit and went on her way. I was in the back of the room and saw how a serious-faced family ended up with joyful smiles on their faces. How her husband’s eyes watered with pride towards his wife and thankfulness to my mother’s kindness. Mom indeed wasn’t political she just loved sparkles!
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Her agreeableness was always apparent to whomever she was talking to in the family. Sitting in her chair, shaking her finger, “ Yah your right, your right” Everyone was always right by Mom!
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The grandchildren knew her laughter and her evil eye if they acted up! They would always say. Funny Grandma, Fancy Grandma, wanting her famous waffles, famous jello. They were shocked of course when we played a game at Christmas one year. Their holy grandmother who does not even say “shut up” was depicting a walking hooker as her turn at charades. Grandma loved every minute of it! Everyone was laughing.
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My dad always said, “Betty has the patience of a Saint”, and she did. Even as death was coming upon her, she patiently waited. Although she was in discomfort, she never complained and when asked how she felt, her answer was always “semi”. While she panted breathlessly at times, she always joked with men saying “don’t worry, I’m not panting for you!.” Every day, the nurses and doctors looked forward to taking care of Mom because, as sick as she was, she never complained and continuously told jokes up until the hour she passed. When asked to take her vital signs, she said “sure, its’ free”. She denied any medication that would ease her discomfort or put her into a fog. She wanted to be alert until God came to take her. It was hard for her to leave this earth because she didn’t want to miss the party.
Even as she lay dying Mom had quick funny one liners. When she looked uncomfortable sitting up in the hospital bed and a friend asked if she would like to lie down, she replied “No, I’ll be laying down forever in a few days”
When given her last rites, and the priest was saying to pray for our sister Betty, she interrupted him to make sure he used her formal name Elizabeth. She wanted to make sure she got through the gates of heaven … as if there was any doubt from those who knew her!
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She had an unconditional love for her children, son-in-laws, grandchildren, and my dad.
She passed February 21st, 2018 knowing how respected and loved she was by everyone.
